Why Every Mum Need To Meditate?
Sep 30, 2020
Do you find yourself yelling at your kids or husband a lot? Or do you bottle up your feelings and burst out one day because you can't hold them in anymore? It's normal because all of us have been there at some point in our lives.
Motherhood is not always a comfortable journey; some days, you feel like you are winning, and others, you have a lot of "mum guilt." Whether you are a SAHM or a working mum, "mum guilt" is prevalent to different degrees.
When we don't get enough sleep, feel overwhelmed by the number of to-dos, or are stressed out by life circumstances, it can take the slightest thing to trigger us into a rage or burst out in tears if we are not aware of our mind and our feelings.
I didn't think I was a yeller. One fine day, when my then-one-year-old son refused to nap after lunch, I lost the plot! I started shouting and crying at the same time and out came all the things that bothered me, like how I needed "me" time and how exhausting it was to be with him all the time. At that moment, it felt like such an out-of-body experience! A wave of "mom guilt" swept over me, and I had a massive cry sitting on the toilet bowl.
The incident shook me and also surprised my son! It made me reflect on my outburst and checked in on what triggered me. At that time, I was feeling the stresses of a new mum and was overwhelmed. I wasn't taking care of my needs and didn't ask for help because I felt guilty. Only my husband and I took care of my son, and we couldn't afford to hire any extra help.
I decided to go back to my meditation practice, which I started when I was pregnant with my son but didn't keep up after his birth. After months of meditating regularly, I found it easier to slow down my reaction towards my son when he is refusing to listen or whining. (Yes! I said it!) I can check in with myself and tell my husband when I'm not feeling 100% so he can take over.
I'm not saying that you will never raise your voice anymore, but I found the tool to help me become aware of my rising reaction. And I can pull back a little, just enough to take a deep breath through it or at least cut my response short so it doesn't escalate to a point where everyone is shouting and crying. It is a constant work in progress.
Another thing that happened through meditating is that I am more present with my kids and my life. I appreciate the little things like the smell of my morning coffee, the sound of my kids giggling in their room or the cold crisp air on my skin when I take a walk.
As mums, we are always multi-tasking and planning, which means we always have a lot on our minds. It can rob us of enjoying what we have right in front of us- being alive, healthy and grateful that we can watch our kids grow up. Master Wu Gui from the movie Kung Fu Panda says, "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift. That's why they call it present".
I hope you try meditation and allow yourself to experience the benefits. If you want to try meditation, let me know how I can support you.
Much love,
Marisa x
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